how to ask what are we to a guy

April 08, 2022 Post a Comment

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Asking a guy to exist your swain can exist scary, but it doesn't accept to exist. With the right mindset, you can have a meaningful conversation virtually the time to come of your relationship with a guy without feeling stressed.

1
Decide whether yous're prepare to commit. The decision to commit tin can exist a tricky ane. Whether or not yous are ready for a committed, steady relationship tin be determined by a number of factors. Every instance is different, and you might have certain expectations for a relationship.^[ane] Ask yourself:
- How practise I experience near him? Practise I feel excited when nosotros are together? Do I miss him when he is gone?
- Can I handle the fourth dimension commitment of a serious relationship correct now? What blazon of relationship do I desire?^[two]
- Have nosotros fought before? If so, how well did we handle information technology?^[3]
- Does he respect me? Are at that place whatsoever carmine flags I am concerned about? Am I uncertain almost his character? Do I trust him?^[4]
- How practise I experience about monogamy? Practise I want an exclusive relationship with 1 person? If so, am I willing to be monogamous with this man? If not, are both parties open to a polyamorous human relationship?
- Am I doing this because he makes me happy? Or are other people pressuring me to have a swain?
2
Have the length of your human relationship into consideration. Request your guy to exist your fellow too soon tin scare him off if the feeling isn't mutual, but waiting too long can create defoliation and hurt feelings. Since all relationships are dissimilar, in that location's no specific amount of time you should expect before request. Trust your instinct. If the timing feels right, information technology might just be.
- If yous have just met the guy, you might desire to continue a few dates earlier y'all inquire him to be your boyfriend. You may not want to commit to someone you merely met.
- Many people ask a partner to become steady or sectional after virtually six dates or i month.^[five]
- Some people wait until they accept dated for 3 months to have the talk.
- If yous have a long altitude relationship, y'all may want to establish this talk sooner rather than subsequently. This volition aid both parties empathize what is expected even when you are far apart.^[half-dozen]
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three
Identify whether the guy is interested. Yous should have some indication almost how the guy feels most yous. The but mode to exist absolutely certain about his feelings is to enquire him, simply you tin can look for certain signs that might indicate his feelings.
- If a human refers to future plans, it might be a sign that he is planning on sticking around with you.^[7]
- If he brags most you to people, peculiarly to his friends, it might evidence that he is proud to be around you.^[8]
- If he sends you texts asking how yous are throughout the day, information technology may mean that he is thinking oftentimes about you.^[9]
- If you lot see each other several times a week and hang out every weekend, it may be a sign that he is becoming more invested in you.^[ten]
iv
Fix yourself for rejection. While you're hoping he agrees to be your boyfriend, keep in mind that he might say no. Your guy may not be prepare for a serious human relationship with you lot, or perhaps he doesn't similar using titles or labels to describe your relationship. Think virtually how you will respond to a rejection.
- If you want a serious relationship with someone who volition commit to you, yous may have to office ways with this guy if he says no. This will allow you to find someone who wants a serious relationship as well.
- If y'all are content with your human relationship, you lot might decide to maintain your electric current condition until he'due south gear up to become your boyfriend.
- If y'all take deep feelings for this guy, you might take to decide whether or non you want to hang out with him subsequently. You might determine to only stay friends, or y'all might decide to cutting off contact until you tin become over him.
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ane
Programme ahead. It volition be easier for you lot if you know when you are going to inquire the question. You tin practice the conversation ahead of time, or you tin identify the correct moment to bring the issue upwards. There is no one right fourth dimension to ask a guy to be your boyfriend. Judge your personal circumstances carefully.
- Some people plan a special date and concur this conversation at the end of a date. Others observe that this conversation comes about naturally when they are hanging out together alone. Either way, cull a practiced day ahead of time.
- Do non ask at a time when the guy volition be stressed, upset, or busy. He may be taken ashamed by the question, and this could affect his reply.^[11]
- If you are feeling nervous, anxious, or jittery, you tin practice what you will say ahead of fourth dimension. In a mirror, try starting the conversation and request the question.^[12]
2
Meet in person. It might be tempting to text or message a guy to ask him, just these questions are best dealt with in person. Talking in person allows yous to explore unlike options for your human relationship. If there are any questions or concerns the guy has, yous can deal with them together.^[13]
- If you're in a long altitude human relationship, information technology may non exist easy to come across up in person. If you can have this conversation during a visit, yous might desire to wait until the end before asking, in example you receive a negative answer. If you cannot ask in person, calling him is the next best option.
3
Determine a adept place for conversation. There is no ane correct place to have the relationship talk, but information technology should be a identify where you can both limited your feelings and discuss your hereafter together. Consider what is right for you and the guy.
- You should probably have this talk while you 2 are lonely. You might broach the question during a walk on the embankment, at the park, or in one of your homes.
- If in that location a place that is special to both of yous—such as the site of your first date or a favorite monument--, you might choose to have the talk there to make it memorable.
- Make certain that the guy is not distracted. Do non ask him during a motion-picture show, while you are out with friends, or when he is working.
- If you ask him while you are in the machine or eating at a restaurant, he may experience trapped. Have the conversation in a place where you are both comfortable.^[14]
4
Introduce the question at the correct moment. While hanging out on your planned day, you should focus on staying relaxed. Wait until a good moment to innovate the topic. Wait for a moment that feels "correct" or "special." If y'all are having difficulty with this, yous can follow some basic guidelines.
- If he compliments you, you might compliment him back, starting a chat on what you lot enjoy about each other. This is a natural segue into the relationship talk.
- If there a menstruum of silence, y'all might bring up the outcome. Say how happy you lot are in the moment, and see if the conversation comes up.
- At the terminate of your date or hang out, you tin can say, "Hey, before yous go, I wanted to talk to you lot almost something."
five
Consider waiting for your guy to bring it up first. If getting around to calling him your "beau" isn't likewise high a priority, consider waiting to run into if your guy mentions information technology outset. This likewise helps you experience out whether your guy is comfortable with using titles or labels to define your human relationship. This might exist a proficient choice if yous are uncertain virtually your feelings or if yous call up that he is uncertain nearly the relationship.
- Do non wait around forever for a guy to bring up the question. Set up a date for yourself before you ask him. For example, yous might give him a month before asking him yourself.
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ane
Get-go with a compliment. Tell the guy what you like well-nigh him. This flattery will relax him, and it will make the relationship question much easier to broach. A compliment about his humor, intelligence, or kindness is a good way to signal how yous call back about him.^[xv]
- You might say, "You know, y'all are so funny. I've never met a guy like you before."
- Another practiced compliment is, "You are very thoughtful. I'thousand so touched by your gestures."
- If he smiles, thanks y'all, or compliments you lot back, it may be a positive sign that he feels similarly about you.
2
Explain your feelings almost him. In one case you lot have started on a positive annotation, it may be easy to start explaining your feelings for him. If yous received a positive reaction from your compliment, you might want to delve deeper into your feelings. Explain to him how you feel virtually him. You might explain that y'all have enjoyed your time together so far or that you are starting to develop feelings.
- You lot might say, "I've had such a adept time with yous so far. You're a really unique person, and I've been thinking a lot virtually our relationship."
- You should probably avoid telling him that you love him at this point. He may go scared or worried that the relationship is moving besides quickly. Instead, you might say that y'all are "developing feelings" or that y'all "actually like" him.
iii
Ask your guy if he wants to exist your boyfriend. It is all-time to inquire him directly about whether or not he is fix to exist your boyfriend. Depending on the situation, you tin arroyo this question in a number of different means.
- You can ask him directly by saying, "Do y'all desire to brand this official? Do you want to become my fellow?"
- If yous're uncertain most the status of your human relationship, y'all tin can inquire, "Where practise you see this relationship going?"
- If either of you are dating multiple people, you can ask, "Do you want to start seeing each other exclusively?"
- If you lot desire to empathize how he sees you, you might say, "I want to know what to tell other people when they ask what our human relationship is. Would you lot say you're my young man?"
4
Establish your expectations. You lot both might have different ideas of what a steady relationship means. Perhaps he'southward ready to date you exclusively but not prepare to run across your family. Maybe he wants to take sex but you want to wait. When you have the talk, you both should clearly state what y'all expect out of the situation.^[16]
- You lot might begin this conversation past asking him, "What does existence a young man hateful to yous?"
- Answer truthfully if he asks you about what you expect in a human relationship. For example, you might say, "I wait a guy to be faithful and to be honest with me. I'1000 not prepare for marriage yet, merely I practise want to explore the possibility of a more serious relationship."
5
Give him fourth dimension to reply. The guy might be feeling pressured or uncomfortable by the question. If he appears anxious, uncomfortable, or hesitant, you might desire to give him a day or 2 to think over his answer. While it may seem every bit though he trying not to commit, he may but need fourth dimension to consider whether or not he'south set up for it.^[17]
- You can say, "If you demand time to remember about it, that's fine. Give it some time earlier y'all make your conclusion."
- If he asks for space, requite him infinite. Yous tin can ask, "How long do you think you demand to figure this out?" Attempt not to bring up the question once more until that time has passed.
- If he does not give you lot a time frame, y'all can inquire again later on a few days. Say, "Hey, I only wanted to know if yous've given any thought to our relationship. Have yous decided where we stand?"
- Exercise non obsessively text, call, or bulletin him well-nigh this outcome. If he did not give you lot a straight respond right away, you might text him once after yous asked the question and over again in a day or two. Give him some space if he needs information technology to make up one's mind.
6
Handle rejection gracefully. If he states that he does not desire to be your boyfriend, try to remain positive. Try to smile, and let him know that you sympathise. He may be content with continuing a casual relationship, or he may want to stop things there. Consider your own feelings before proceeding.
- If he wants to end things, respect his choice. Give thanks him for your fourth dimension together, merely state that you understand. You might say, "I'm pitiful to hear that, simply I had fun with you lot. Good luck in the future."
- If he wants to proceed a casual human relationship but you lot want to end things, you lot might say, "I think it would all-time if we stopped seeing each other and then." If he asks why, simply state, "Information technology seems that we desire different things."
- He might country that he wants to stay friends with y'all. Practise not agree unless you are willing to be just friends. If y'all feel every bit though this would be hard, be honest. Say, "I'g not sure that will work out for me. You're a smashing guy, but I think I will need some space."
- Some men may "ghost" you lot or terminate contacting y'all. Information technology is natural to feel upset near this, but information technology does not mean that he necessarily dislikes y'all. He may only experience awkward about the state of affairs.^[eighteen]
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Question

How long till I enquire him to be my boyfriend?

Imad Jbara is a Dating Coach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York Metropolis. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-i Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

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Support wikiHow past unlocking this skilful answer.

Enquire him about his previous relationships. To work up to asking a guy to exist your fellow, try asking him how long it took for him and his significant other to assemble in his start human relationship. That tin help you judge how long information technology takes him to warm up to someone.
Question

How do you ask a guy if he'due south serious about you?

Imad Jbara is a Dating Motorcoach for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-1 Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to improve their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the University of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

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Ask him if he'southward serious almost y'all, and pay attention to his response. Keep in mind that not answering you lot is an answer. If he says something similar, "Nosotros're having fun together," then they're probably not taking things seriously but they're not confident plenty to say information technology direct.
Question

How do I ask him to exist official?

Imad Jbara is a Dating Omnibus for NYC Wingwoman LLC, a relationship coaching service based in New York City. 'NYC Wingwoman' offers matchmaking, wingwoman services, 1-on-one Coaching, and intensive weekend bootcamps. Imad services 100+ clients, men and women, to better their dating lives through authentic communication skills. He has a BA in Psychology from the Academy of Massachusetts Dartmouth.

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Support wikiHow by unlocking this good answer.

Be directly. It might be scary to do so, only the best way to get about asking a guy to be your swain is by expressing how you feel. You tin also try asking questions like "What are your plans for united states of america?" or "Where do you see this going?"
Question

My friend asked my crush if he liked me and all he did was chroma. What does this mean?

It means he likes you but he'due south likewise nervous to admit it. You lot should ask him yourself, he'd probably be much more likely to be honest with yous. Practise it in a private place and so he doesn't get embarrassed.
Question

What do I if he says "possibly" - does information technology mean yep or no?

Sometimes it's harder for guys to empathise and be certain most their feelings. If he said "maybe," just give him some time to think it over.
Question

How old should I be to have a boyfriend?

Rober2006

Community Answer

It honestly depends on how prepare you lot are. Some people are set up at 10, others are ready at 18.
Question

I've had a beat out on this guy for a long time and he asked me out twice and I said no and since then, I've realized how much of a jerk he was, but I still like him! What practice I do? He too asked out my BFF.

If he'southward a wiggle then you don't need him. You deserve better and if he truly liked yous he wouldn't have injure you by asking out your best friend. Move on and observe someone else.
Question

How can I tell if my ex boyfriend still likes me?

Think nearly how often yous talk and how comfy he is around you. If you talk rarely or he is uncomfortable or defensive around you, he probably doesn't have feelings for y'all anymore. But if he talks to you a lot, tries to impress you, and/or compliments you, and seems really comfortable, there is a good take chances he still likes y'all.
Question

What if he is not ready to take a girlfriend, and so he started ignoring me?

Tell him you sympathise and you'd like to still be friends. Perhaps in the time to come when he's prepare things will be different. For now, don't push, just focus on getting to know him and being his friend.
Question

Is it okay to appointment a person of a different color?

Warriors4laf

Community Respond

Of course it is! You tin date anyone you desire, no matter what they look like.

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Unlike relationships operate on different terms and schedules. Don't exist pressured or ashamed if your relationship does not move at the aforementioned speed as your friends' relationships.
If you only met your crush, don't rush it. Get to know him then peradventure try something with him.
Have some time after you lot become a couple before yous progress your human relationship. While each human relationship moves at its own speed, he may not exist prepare for more serious steps, such as meeting your parents or moving in with you.
Exist clear in your expectations for a relationship so that nobody gets hurt.

It is natural to feel sad, upset, or depressed after a rejection. Try to distract yourself with activities that y'all enjoy, and spend some time with your friends.
Do not harass or carp a homo to get your boyfriend. If he is uninterested, the all-time affair you tin practice is move on.
Practise non get angry if a man does not want to be your boyfriend. There are many reasons he could have said no. Peradventure he is not in a adept place for a relationship, or maybe yous ii are not correct for each other.

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Article Summary X

The best way to ask a male child to be your boyfriend is to practice it in person when you're both alone, relaxed, and having a good time. Start by telling him what y'all like nearly him and then explain your feelings toward him. And then, inquire him to be your beau, and define what that means to you. For advice from our reviewer on how long to give him to reply, and what to do if he says no, read on!

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